I LOVE PUNS!

ENJOY!

PUNS FOR EDUCATED MINDS
1. The roundest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference.. Heacquired his size from too much pi.
2. I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out tobe an optical Aleutian .
3. She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still.
4. A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class, because it was a weapon of math disruption.
5. No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery.
6. A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for littering.
7. A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in LinoleumBlownapart.
8. Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.
9. A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are looking into it.
11. Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
12. Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway. One hat said to the other: 'You stay here; I'll go on a head.'
13. I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.
14. A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center said: 'Keep off the Grass.'
15.. The short fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small medium atlarge.
16. The man who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasonedveteran.
17. A backward poet writes inverse.
18. In a democracy it's your vote that counts. In feudalism it's your countthat votes.
19. When cannibals ate a missionary, they got a taste of religion.
20. Some wives mend their husband's socks Others don't give a darn.

(Thanks, Frank!)