NOT MUCH, BUT THAT'S OK

THE RECENT STORMS that have done so much damage to so many people have once again blessedly missed us. But, last night we did have a little excitement, a frozen precip event that lasted about an hour. I was told there was some thunder with it, but we were watching Northern Exposure, so I missed that. The snow/ice piled up on a few surfaces and is still on the roof tops. You can see the size of the ice crystals best on the adirondack. Snow/ice and a camellia... We are now waiting for a little snow storm. Yep, that is what the radio is saying, I can see it on the radar... but back in the 60s by Wednesday. But, for now, the boys are tucked in their heated box toasting their toes and cat-napping, as usual. The heat is on in the greenhouse... Hmmmm, I just saw something white pass by the window. Oh, my. I hope you all are warm and safe.
Pray for those poor folks who were not so lucky and lost their homes to all those tornadoes.

FRUSTRATIONS

FRUSTRATIONS... oh shame on me for being frustrated with this computer. This will not be much of a post, mostly it will be to see if I have loaded my photo programs right... I gave all my discs to the computer dude down the street - he makes his living doing this stuff, drives a new Mercedes to prove it - but things are still never quite right. None of my photo discs got installed, for example, and that is just the tip of the iceberg. So, to see if things were working, I went out and took a picture of the pot of pansies (aren't they beautiful? Especially to those of you buried up to your knees in snow or ice today?) I got from Bobbie yesterday... and a shot thru the door of the greenhouse with its heating system on - the brooder lamp on a bucket of bricks. Hey! It works! The ordinary incandescent bulb heats up the metal and the bricks - the bricks retain the heat... and it keeps the greenhouse in the 40s or 50s depending on how bad it is outside. Here on the shore, lots of folks keep their pumps from freezing in the winter just with one incandescent bulb. So I figure if it will keep a pump from freezing in a pump-house outside that is as big or bigger than my little greenhouse, well, it ought to keep my geraniums toasty and my impatiens from freezing... and my other plants and cuttings, too.
Did you notice the size of the daffodils next to the pansies? They are up about 8 inches. This may be a year when they bloom in mid-February.
But, back to the shame on me part. Living in this country, we tend to moan and groan over the most trivial things. OK, let me rephrase that - I tend to moan and groan over stuff that is merely inconvenient at the moment, and forget how darn lucky I am. Here I am complaining about having to load a couple photo discs so I can download pictures from either of my Nikons, and for the moment not thinking about the millions of people who still live without electricity, let alone computers and cameras. Yes, it is hard to believe that such people exist, but they do. Believe me, they do. We are so spoiled here. Even the poor in this country somehow manage to have cell phones, and other devices even tho they do not have decent food on their tables. So, I am ashamed of myself for grumbling about having to install a bunch of discs myself. But then, I paid someone else to get this computer back to where it was - minus the virus - and, well, it isn't. Hard to believe that the old computer was 8 years old before it had to get wiped clean and this one was but 8 months old. So much for McAfee.
I know I am going to have to change my ISP, and I so dread that... mostly I dread trying to wade thru the crap on the phone with Verizon. You would think the phone company would have an easier system to access. Oh how I long for the old days when there was an office down on the corner where I could go and pay my bill in person, add a phone, a new phone line, change a listing, put a phone in another house 40 miles from here, and get a nice visit with the real person doing all this for me. Often Progress ain't! Yet, there are those who have to travel over 100 miles to get to a phone or to a service if they have a cell phone. So, here I am grumbling again in a house with so many phones I can't count them. There is usually one in reach wherever you are. Spend some time in a wheelchair or being unable to get up and walk and you will understand.
So I guess I need to do a gratitude list... not just that my brain worked well enuf to install the photo programs... not just that I own a computer that is working (more or less) - and a camera or two... but that I do have electricity, heat, a roof over my head, food in my tummy, managed to get myself dressed, fed the cats, and got outside to take these pictures. Then I must add that I have a wonderful friend that gave me these pansies... and I can go on and on.
Like I said, shame on me for complaining.

MY MEMORIAL GARDEN

 

Each season, as I walk around my yard, I look at all the beauty out there... most of my plants came from somebody - well, half of them, anyway. As I look at this or that camellia, clump of daffodils, even some of my trees, I think about the people that gave them to me - most of those folks are gone now - but as the beauty of their loving gift lives on - they live on.  I treasure each bloom, and my heart talks to the one who gave it to me. I send them a little prayer of thanks, be they here or moved on, and pray for their peace and comfort, wherever they are, and that they may have beauty in their current or new life.

        This morning, my grandfather's favorite peony opened. He died in 1954. At the time, I was his only grandchild. Our house in the Poconos has a tenth of a mile of road frontage, most of it planted in now very old peony bushes, all planted by Grandpop. My dad dug this one (and a few others) and brought them here. It’s like a Memorial garden, my place. Old friends and lovers, relatives and acquaintances, former students, neighbors, are all represented in my yard. Each plant, each bloom, is a token of love.

Just yesterday, an old pick-up pulled in the yard, with a middle aged guy and an elderly woman. I did not know them. The gentleman apologized for bothering me… but explained how his mother always made him slow down when they drove past my place. She sat there and just grinned the biggest grin. “Mama’s eye sight ain’t what it used t’ be,” he said, “But she can still see the bright colors of yer ‘zalyers and camalyers, and, what’s them things?” he said pointing to the peonies just opening. “Funny, ain’t it how the camelyers bloom in the winter time? Mama loves to see the red ones in the snow. Made me drive out in that snow last winter just to see your bushes.” The old lady was nodding her head up and down.

“Well, I prob’ly shun’da stopped an’ bothered ye, but mama seen ya out in the yard and wanted to say Thank ye fer bringing a bit of beauty to her world.” (Ye is not part of a religious group speak – it is just part of the old Eastern Shore dialect spoken by many of the old farmers and watermen.)

“Thank ya!” the old woman said as he backed the truck back out onto the road. She waved a little wave with gnarled, tanned fingers, aged by years of hard work. I could just see those hands plucking chickens, pickin’ crabs, canning tomatoes and preserves. She would have recipes in her head for the best pickled watermelon rind, and know exactly how long to cook soft-shelled crabs. I wondered how many diapers those hands had changed and washed and hung on the line to dry. How many little shoes had she tied? How hard had her life been? But how much joy had been there also? How many children did she have? Had she had to bury any of them? And how lucky she was to have a son to take her out on a nasty winter’s day to see my red camellias in the snow, or pull in my yard to thank me for bringing a bit of beauty to the world. That is love. And that is why I work so hard out there.

But sometimes beauty comes in different packages… not always flowers. Living here in a rural area, I get to see a lot of critters people in cities just never get to see. (Although we DID have a MOOSE walk up the street in front of our house in Portland, Maine!) Some critters are all too obvious, the deer running across the road or nibbling on the shrubbery, the coons getting into the left over cat food… but, some of them are not obvious at all, just a chance sighting every now and then. Possum sightings are few, as are seeing foxes, both gray and red, but they are there. Looking up as a shadow passes over, one might see the local bald eagle or a red-tailed hawk. Looking down, there is a world of little critters, blue tailed skinks being the most obvious, and on to the tiny critters with 6 legs.

As I type this, there is an orchard oriole in the ground level birdbath. But he seems to notice any movement at the window, so the pictures come up empty. They are rare around here. Yet cardinals are common as are the bright, flashy little goldfinches that hangout in my yard. Might it be all the thistle feeders I have? Let it be said, I do not take them for granted. I do ply them with feeders filled of their favorite snacks! Of my 4 pairs of cardinals that have spent the winter here, I have found the nesting places of 3 of the couples and their babies. One family is in the huge Acuba outside the bathroom window, the other 2 families are in camellias. I am not sure about couple #4.

Once in a while, looking straight ahead holds some amazing surprises. I almost leaned my shovel against this tree trunk – caught it just in time – and came inside to grab the camera. This happy couple were fortunately still there resting on the tree trunk. Even driving by on the tractor and loading tons of mulch a couple feet away did not disturb them. But then, they are Luna moths, and they only fly around at night.

If you know me at all, you know how difficult it is to walk and do things, but staying as active as possible helps my serenity. Working out in the yard and having my little veggie garden “does something” for me. There is a sense of peace playing in the dirt, and a sense of comfort from being surrounded by so much beauty and the gifts from those who love and have loved me. And there is always the 4 legged company I have whenever out in the yard, the little yellow cat that rolls over to get his tummy rubbed. He, too, was a gift… a gift that blew in on a hurricane, Hurricane Isabel. I wonder who loved him before I did. This is his home now, and he guards it fiercely. I don’t know for sure what happened to him to make him leave his first home all those years ago, but he, too, has found peace here.

Life is good.

SPRING, FINALLY, and LUNATIC SQUIRRELS

I THINK SPRING has finally arrived - no, not just on the calendar, but out in the yard where it counts! The rains took a vacation this week and the yard is trying to dry out... but more rain is POSSIBLE... SIGH. It has been wonderful to hang the laundry back out on the line. Yes, I am an old fashion woman - I like to hang clothes outside. Dryers are OK for when it rains or is below freezing, but give me a clothes line any day. My lakes, which used to be grass to mow, are now moss beds when not under water... I wonder when the grass will come back? Or will it this year????? The ditches still have water in them as do many of the farmer's fields. They have been liming the fields that they can get into, but ya can't take your tractor into a lake, even if the water is only 4 or 5 inches deep. I feel for the farmers... it has been a rough year. Even Buddha is sitting by a lake. As the water has receeded, the deer have been eating the buds off the young trees and along the mossy patches of ground. I scare them at night when I take stuff out to the compost pile. It is hard to see... but see those 2 bright dots? Sometimes I am not sure who scares whom the most. When the wind is blowing we can almost bump into each other out there! Spook and Punkin like to sneak up on them in the dark. Such funny boys! Sometimes Spook pretends he is a garden figurine. Saint Spook here.... The birds are making their spring noises staking out their territories and fighting each other at the bird feeders. This guy is saying, "I dare you to come near this feeder!" It certainly sounds like spring. The squirrels seem to have gotten a little nutty. Sorry. One in particular... he is chewing on everything... he seems determined to destroy anything in his path. I had to take down the squirrel feeder because the fool was eating the plastic, not the food - even when he was inside the feeder where the food was, he sat and chewed on the plastic like he could not figure how to get out. He has also chewed the bottom of the big bird feeder. I had to put a pie tin in the bottom. The good part is, the daffodils have finally started to bloom. Not sure what happened to the crocus - just one or 2 little clumps this year, and a month late! Guess they gave up. Another sure sign of spring is the wheelbarrow out for its maiden voyage of the year, carting old left over wet leaves to the compost pile and toting fresh mulch in to a few low areas. The best part of the day, however, was the uncovering of the adirondack I never got in out of the yard last year... Oh it felt good to sit in the sun in this chair.

AWARDS, GRATITUDE, AND GIFTS

AWARDS, GRATITUDE, AND GIFTS

First and foremost, let me thank Connie at W. Va. Fur and Root for the award. It is with humility and gratitude that I receive this gift! However, I have no idea how to post it – I assume that is what I am supposed to do – or even how to get it. I am technologically very challenged, you see. I have been given awards before and even changed my whole blog layout from one I really liked to this one in order to be able to post awards and lists of people, blogs I follow and other things… I have even paid for a couple very expensive phone calls to bloggers trying to walk me thru the process. We came to the conclusion – my computer – or my connection – just will not do this. I have a very slow dial up connection. VERY SLOW. Watching a 3 minute youtube might take an hour to load. There are some videos that just simply will not download. I am on the Planning Commission – when I get sent a copy of the zoning ordinance, for example, and I click open – I can go out and cut the grass, go buy groceries, and the screen is still blank when I come back in. I have to beg someone else to print a copy for me. Very humiliating.

So, for those of you who appreciate my little blog – I do thank you. It makes it all worth while. The purpose of the blog is to share a little joy, a little beauty, a smile with anyone who wants to look. I try not to push any political agenda other than Peace or any religious agenda other than Love and Compassion for all – even for those who hate my guts because I do not believe exactly the way they do – or who criticize me because I do not attend their church.
I try to dwell on the things in life that bring peace, not sorrow. I strive to keep in mind how good it is to be able to have the simple things, to be able to DO the simplest of things. I have friends who, when they know I am struggling (I have Lymes Disease) ask me if I’ve got my socks on. That is our measurement for how well I am doing, because one day I only managed to get one sock on – and carried the other around in my pocket incase someone came by – I would have let them help me put it on. But I got everything else on! I was up, on my feet, even though my feet numbered 6 that day, 2 of them with wheels. (Don’tcha love walkers with wheels and seats? And if you have never had to use one, there is your bit of gratitude for the day!) My philosophy is to always look for the bright spot and not dwell in the shadows – unless the sun is too hot and it is 90 degrees!
Today, I dressed myself and managed to do the dishes, feed the cats. The walker is parked somewhere, the cane is still beside my bed, one is in the car… wheelchair is in the barn. It is a good day! A little while ago I heard from my good blogger friend, Philip, in Ontario, that it is snowing at his place. (Tossing Pebbles in the Stream) Now, I have a love/hate relationship with snow. I think it is beautiful, magical… but I live in the South – not the DEEP South, but in Virginia, and on the coast. Snow is rare. OK, maybe not rare, ummm, well, we can go for several years with no snow at all, or we can get a serious snow storm and a couple feet! But, that is rare! As I read his letter, I looked out the window and then at the thermometer – the sun is shining, it is in the low 60s. Heaven must be about this temperature.
It made it up to the lower 70s yesterday. I went out to take a look at the awesome flowers blooming in the yard. We had an “almost frost” here a couple days ago. An “almost frost” means my neighbors got frost, but my trees kept my place safe. That means my neighbors can now use the term Indian Summer, since one has to have a frost, supposedly a killing frost, before one can accurately use that term. One little open area did get a touch of frost, I guess… this mini rose looks a tad bruised around the edges. Wow, in reality, this little rose as about the size of a 50 cent piece. The red mums look faded, but the yellow ones are still bright and cheerful. The true frost reporter is the impatiens. They are still nice as is the Strobilanthes. The fall camellias are really turning on. It is one reason why I stay here. I can’t imagine not having camellias pretty much all winter. This is Ice Angel. The bees are busy getting their last bit of pollen before the cold temps knock them out again. The daisies by Buddha were filled with busy bees and butterflies. See the fall azalea? This azalea is next to the Beauty Berry Bush. The Adirondacks are still out, I will have a sit in one of them later – might even eat lunch out there. While everyone else had frost yesterday, I had a heavy dew. Pretty isn’t it? Even weeds can be pretty in the frost. This one was pretty just with the sunlight and dew. In case you think I am making too much of the sunlight – we had a solid 6 days of rain last week and over the week-end, temps in the 50s to barely 60, and over 3 inches of rain. The sun is very welcome! One other result of all the rain, however, is a plethora of mushrooms. I found this little family while cleaning out my ground level birdbath. Note the violets are in bloom again! The stone is from my back yard in the Poconos. We have no stones here - they are all imports!
So, my gratitude list and my gifts to be shared today are all these pictures and more, the fact that I was able to get outside and take these pictures, that I have a yard considered by many to be an uncontrolled jungle, by others a place of beauty in all seasons. I might mention my gratitude for an amazing camera that helps me to take these great shots – well, those that are great… and the friend that ignored my request for no Christmas presents last year and gave me this Nikon. She said it was embarrassing to watch me drool every time the Nikon commercial came on, and the whimpering broke her heart…

I am grateful for all of you who share your lives with me - your flowers, your puppies, your new kittens... This is Lynn's newest family member - (not yet named - any suggestions?)I am grateful for my little companion, Punkin, who accompanies me on my photo shoots (and everything else outside!) I am grateful for all of you who read my blog – for those of you who comment on the blog as well as those of you who email or phone me. You know this blog is a labor of love – (this post took 3 hours) - love to be shared. And I am grateful for those of you who call (or email) when you haven’t seen or heard from me… and especially for those of you who answer your phones when I have fallen and can’t get back up. It is humiliating to have to call someone when you are sprawled out on the ground, but then I am reminded of my gratitude for my telephone service… and my chiropractor who has been putting things back together (and keeping me out of the wheelchair most of the time) for over 20 years. Thank you Susan!
I am so fortunate to have so many caring friends in my life. I would try to name you all – but I would not know which name to start with… Each friend is special in his or her own special way. I am grateful for you all – you are all gifts!

GRATITUDE... AND TOILET PAPER

This has been an unusual week. The first of the week was good. I have been feeling better (except for the nausea from the Lymes meds), walking better… getting things done, though not as fast as I’d like them to be done – and then on Wednesday, after walking around and taking pictures at the train station, the knee popped. I don’t know quite what happened, maybe another bone spur broke off in there, all I know is, it hurts. Imagine a thorn under your kneecap where there is supposed to be synovial fluid… but there isn’t much fluid there, so the thorn (bone) scrapes around as you move. Now the good thing is (always gotta find something good here) eventually if you keep moving enough (versus sitting on your keester feeling sorry for yourself) you will eventually grind this thorn down to powder and then you won’t notice the pain as it disintegrates. Sooooo, I was back to being reminded of my gratitude list of strange but simple things – I put my own socks on today, all by myself!
It is strange how when we are able bodied we just do not think about how damned lucky we are to be able to do simple things – walk to the refrigerator and get a drink of water, fix a cup of coffee for ourselves, feed the cats… (Which reminds me of why I do not have a dog… When I cannot walk, who is going to take the dog out?)
When Aunt Kathryn broke her wrist, she realized the difficulty of just getting her slacks on and off. Have you ever had to care for someone who could not manage getting to the bathroom themselves? Have you ever been in that predicament? I have. So on my gratitude list I put being able to go to the bathroom by myself. With that in mind, did you ever have to use an outhouse? In the winter? In the rain? In the summer with all the bugs to keep you company? In the middle of the night? What? No electricity? All things we so take for granted. There is nothing like a bum knee to remind one of these things. I remember having my pelvis broken… in 2 places. Now that hurt.
I was talking to a girl last week who had absolutely NOTHING to be grateful for. She had lost her job and had a number of other problems, but could see nothing beyond having lost that job and the anger of it. She kind of barked at me – “Name one thing you are grateful for!” after seeing me hobble into the room where we were meeting. She could see that I was having a hard time, I was in pain. “Go on, just one thing!”
So, I said, “Toilet paper.” She looked at me with shock, disbelief that I had said such a stupid thing, then you could see her mind playing with the concept of life without toilet paper… “Well, OK, yeah, but that’s not what I meant. Look at you. You can barely walk!”
“Well, that is true, but I did walk in here under my own power. My wheelchair is still in the barn gathering dust. But I am still on my feet. And you (she is a nurse) did not have to empty my bedpan. Toilet paper. And the fact that things could be so much worse… what happened to you can be corrected. You have a chance to make things right. I am allergic to metals. I cannot have a knee replacement. My knee can not be made right. But I can learn to live with it and focus on other things.
“If you want to do a negative gratitude list, you can look at the fact that you are not bedridden, you have not lost your family, you are not planning a funeral for any of your children, you are not in jail, you do not have to look for your dinner in a dumpster… Now turn those things around, you can walk, you can dress yourself, you have a roof over your head, you have a family, you have food…”
“Yeah, right, and I have toilet paper.”
Sometimes people just have to have time to think things thru. It is not always easy.